One of my lifelong dreams has been to turn on top 40 radio and hear some pop tartlet subtly dropping product placements for my fake sweatshop products into their newest hot single. So you can imagine how excited I was when I read this email yesterday from Mr. Kluger, wherein he offered me an oppertunity I just couldn’t pass up.
from Adam Kluger
date Thu, Aug 21, 2008 at 1:17 PM
subject RE: Product Placement oppertunity
I’m writing because we feel you may be a good company to participate in a brand integration campaign within the actual lyrics of one of the worlds most famous recording artists upcoming song/album.
Lyrics play an important part in the use of music as marketing, Just as a catchy tune could assail your senses, a good “jingle” or cute lyrics could become a part of society for quite some time, imagine your brand name being a part of that.
This is the opportunity of a lifetime, the chance to make your product a house-hold name. The artists demographic is typically 16-35 and once we get a chance to speak further, i’m sure you’ll be glad we contacted you. (emphasis mine)
Get back to me at (949) 379-2008.
And my reply:
Dear Mr. Kluger,
Thank you very much for contacting Double Happiness Jeans. Let’s cut right to the chase. We are extremely interested in having our product promoted by some of the worlds most famous recording artists. No question about it. We’re sold.
One question though: Can we choose the artist? Of course, my first choice would be the Jonas Brothers. Their Disney-fresh style just screams “Virtual Sweatshop Jeans” to me. I could also settle for Avril if necessary. It’s the youth that I’m after, if you get me. Heavy on the “16”. Light on the “35”, if you know what I mean.
On a personal note, I’d like to say that I simply don’t understand all of the fuss about product placement. I say: if you can deliver me a catchy tune while simultaneously informing me about a new hot Axe body spray fragrance, well you have just saved me precious time! Words are words, whether they are about axe body spray or “hitting me one more time”.
Hey, let’s get this deal done. My brand is ready for top 40 radio. I want to be a part of society via my brand of virtual sweatshop jeans. I want to be a house-hold name! And I believe that you are the guy who is going to make that happen. Let’s put some pen to paper and make marketing history.
Mr. Jeff Crouse
Director of Operations,
Double Happiness Jeans
Editors note: Through a separate email Adam Kluger claims that, while this email is signed by him, it was sent by a sales rep through the use of automated software, not him personally.
Read more about this post on Wired’s Listening Post blog
UPDATE: A representative from Adam Kluger Public Relations in New York City (http://www.adamklugerpr.com/) contacted wired.com to say that there should also be no confusion over the fact that their New York City based PR Firm, founded by a former television producer (CNN, FOX), also coincidentally named Adam Kluger, is not involved in this issue in any way and should not be confused with the Adam Kluger quoted above in this article.