Young hipsters and meeks who like arts and crafts, etc, but have no real talent or interest in serving the interests of commerce and progress, should indeed quit their jobs and find some quaint commune in which to ply their mediocre wears.

Don’t misread my tone – there is, indeed, moral integrity in this. They should leave. With their tight hipster tee-shirts stretched across there soft underbellies, and their toothless, slow, suckled draws – they should leave.

Those intrepid who remain perhaps do so because they know there are good companies out there, and good products lead by blessed visionaries.

Visionaries will always need their advertising Cyrano Debergeracs – we renaissance men and women, who give voice to progress.

The best of us do so without lying, without compromising our values.

We don’t merely write copy and design art – we help clarify companies’ visions. We, with the souls of poets, are in touch with the power of perceived altruism in the marketplace; we – the true creatives – have tremendous power to influence our clients’ behavior and make the world a better place in the process.

Why should you waft like ghosts in our hallowed halls when your pure destiny is selling garbage collages at sleepy street fairs for $50 a pop?

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